Epic Ninja Work: Orca Theft
I've been putting this story off since I've been in the middle of moving, but it deserves to be told (and Paul has been bugging me about it).
I was doing my usual scan-and-salvage work a few nights ago, when a call went out from a fellow Ninja named Flash Granola:
Flash Granola > ... okay, so I've got a guy sitting in an exhumer with an empty Orca next to him
Flash Granola > I need a orca pilot in Taru stat
As it happens, I have an alt character that can fly Orcas - which make for excellent mobile bases when looting and salvaging.
Khalia Nestune > Flash: unpiloted??
Khalia Nestune > on my way
Taru was about 15 hops from where my Orca pilot was located, giving us some time to devise a plan. Flash was in a Covops ship, cloaked nearby from the miner and the unpiloted Orca. The asteroids they were mining were in the second room of this mission deadspace. My Orca pilot can't fly Covops, so our short plan was: Fit a prototype cloak to a Rifter, cloak as soon as I came on grid, and slowly make my way over to the Orca. At that point I could jettison from the Rifter and board the Orca.
Other factors in our favor: The miner's Hulk was more than 20km away from the Orca. He would not be able to eject from the Hulk and fly to the Orca in less than 40 seconds or so. Since the session timer for ejecting and boarding is 30 seconds, there shouldn't be any problem.
Edit: In all the excitement, I had forgotten that I can directly board another ship, as a commenter below pointed out.
Soon I'm in Taru. I warp to Flash and enter the first gate, slowboat to the second gate and warp through. I'm hovering over the cloak button, but I end up less than 3000 meters from the Orca! I quickly eject to start my 30 second timer - and start holding my breath.
I'm calling out every five seconds on the count down and spamming the board button, my eyes glued to the Hulk. Time runs out and ... I've got myself a new Orca! The miner hasn't done a thing yet, and Flash goes to flip one of his three cans of ore. I push the Orca over toward the can to scoop it up.
I start checking the Orca and realize it's rigged for cargo - there's another 50m on the sale price. This is looking like a great day. At this point the miner convos me; I try for a scam - without success.
Auralia Galladtri > really...?
Markus El'kar > nice ship man
Markus El'kar > I love these things
Markus El'kar > you know it's not a very good idea to leave things unsecured
Markus El'kar > it's a dangerous universe out there!
Auralia Galladtri > ive never had someone try this, ive done it a lot..
Markus El'kar > Well now you know
Markus El'kar > and I'm about 400-450m richer
Markus El'kar > thanks! =)
Auralia Galladtri > is there anything i can do to get that back..
Markus El'kar > hmm
Auralia Galladtri > at least the stuff in it..
Markus El'kar > what, the crappy ships?
Auralia Galladtri > i mean, the ship alone is a huge blow to me, but then also the stuff in ship maintenence and corp hangar
Auralia Galladtri > and the cargo container.
Auralia Galladtri > and perhaps i can just pay you the price of the ship
Markus El'kar > wow, nice mods on this
Markus El'kar > oh yeah, gang links too
Markus El'kar > well, hmm
Markus El'kar > it was some work to get this thing
Markus El'kar > How about I give it to you for market price; send me the 400m and we'll call it even
Auralia Galladtri > sure, if you right up the contract
Markus El'kar > oh hurm
Markus El'kar > I do a lot of selling, my contracts are full up :(
Auralia Galladtri > have one of your friends/alts set it up
Markus El'kar > if you want, send me half and I take the other half after you get the ship
Auralia Galladtri > no
Markus El'kar > oh well
Markus El'kar > sorry we couldn't do business =)
Auralia Galladtri > why not st up a contract.
Markus El'kar > full up and I'm in a small corp (just 2 guys)
Markus El'kar > If you change your mind give me a ring
Markus El'kar > see ya =)
About this time we notice a Proteus - a dangerous T3 ship - on directional scanner. We're not in any danger in the Orca, but I warp up. Flash tried to engage the Proteus for kicks, and unsurprisingly lost. It was that kind of high we were at.
We celebrated by flying back to home base and stripping down the Orca for sale. I found a Heron and a Cormorant in the ship bay. The real surprise was the cargo container full of valuable mining equipment.
I later found decryptors worth around 15M ISK. The Orca was put up on contract for 450M and sold in an hour. The other items were put up with sell orders; the total proceeds from items on the ship was around 75M. Flash and I both made about 260M ISK.
It's my opinion that this is going to happen again - as it has before by other members of my corp. There are many miners using the Orca as a giant jet-can, and they need to learn that players are not safe anywhere in Eve. I'm happy to teach that lesson.
10 comments
"He would not be able to eject from the pod and fly to the Orca in less than 40 seconds or so. Since the session timer for ejecting and boarding is 30 seconds, there shouldn’t be any problem."
I stopped reading the whole fail-story here and went directly for comments section. Sadly, empty. I actually can't believe that you can fly Orca and yet don't know that you can board ships without ejecting from your current ship (and without the whole boarding-timer shenanigans that makes this non-story). Also:
"He would not be able to eject from the pod and fly to the Orca in less than 40 seconds or so."
What the fuck is "ejecting from a pod" supposed to achieve and how can on even do that?
Also - please, stop writing stories.
Has somebody stolen your ship before or something in this manner?? Wow the emo rage... And I've been playing awhile now myself but never knew this. Unless you live out of a POS, ejecting and boarding another ship isn't something people do on a regular basis (at least intelligent people, barring any person like Mr. Galladtri). I personally have never done it but if it ever does happen, that's good info to know.
Mmmmm rage-tears.
I wrote this late at night and was pretty tired. I had meant to say "eject from the Hulk" not "eject from the pod". Fixed.
Nice little haul. People are remarkably careless.
Why not just warp in with your pod and board?
Well, I would have been visible to the miner. Also pods move slowly, and if I had warped in a good distance from the Orca, he would have had a better chance to reboard it.
I ♥ People that don't know that all they have to do is target the other ship and no one but the owner can board it.
Not sure if the locking thing works anymore. However, I am amazed that after reading this, that people are using Orcas as giant jetcans. Serves em right for doing so. I fly an Orca and would never consider this sort of usage. Of course it also helps to have other accounts flying Hulks. :)
"The locking thing" still works, but once a Hulk would be bumped off the 6,500m boarding range, it would just be a matter of bumping him off targeting range to steal the Orca.
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